Feeling fat…?

If you are feeling a bit bloated and sluggish after a few days of filling your belly with holiday foods, you are probably not alone. Enjoying delicious foods during holidays is common in all cultures and traditions – food brings us pleasure and comfort and allowing ourselves to experience this pleasure is also part of Intuitive Eating.

However, many of us misinterpret these fullness signals from our bodies as feeling “fat”. I find it interesting, that we pick that particular word to describe our internal physical and emotional state, when most of us is fully aware of the fact that “fat” is not a feeling!

There are much better descriptors of our feelings and sensations. We may be feeling full, heavy, or sluggish. We may feel worried, sad, or frustrated. We may feel low on energy. Yet, we summarize our feelings in one word: fat. It is not really surprising though, because obviously we believe that fat=bad, and we feel “bad” indeed.

I have read an interesting article over the holidays. The focus here is on people with eating disorders, so there is much talk about body dysmorphia. Of course, when “underweight” individuals express their “fat feelings”, we immediate oppose and try to convince them they cannot feel “fat” because they are not “fat”! Although it is still a form of gaslighting, since we deny the reality of their emotional states, at least we can feel justified in our disagreement.

What happens though when someone who is “overweight”, according to the flawed BMI measure, feels “fat”? If we are polite, we might also disagree and express platitudes such as: but you have such a beautiful face, or similar. Still, we would also likely share our favourite diet and exercise regime – as the way to remedy this “fat” feeling by the means of manipulating the size of the body.

However, the size of our body, as correctly noted in the previously linked article, is unlikely the main cause of our feeling “fat”. Internal bodily sensations and emotional states (often caused by those physical sensations in the first place) are the usual culprits. If we allow ourselves to listen to these sensations, we might discover a much better solution to our “problem” than another failed lifestyle change (AKA a diet).

Mindfulness and meditation are time-proven methods of getting in touch with the immediate physical, mental, and emotional reality of the present moment. In my own life as well as in my coaching practice, I use these simple ways of noticing where these judgmental and usually very critical thoughts originate. It is really fascinating to observe how our internal physical sensations can trigger emotional states (and vice versa), which can be in turn magnified by our thought patterns.

The more I practice this compassionate awareness, the easier it is for me to accept my habitual reactions and respond to the challenges (such as the holiday “over-eating”) in a healthy way. For me, this never includes a diet or vigorous exercise, but rather, a bit of rest and a mindful walk to get some fresh air. I give my body the time to do the work of digestion by listening to the signals of satiation it sends me. Once my body is ready, it will also let me know when it’s time to move, time to eat, and time to rest again.

Listed below are a few of my typical cues to arrive in the present moment, feel into my body and listen attentively and affectionately for those subtle signals my body sends:

• Feeling “fat”
• Having a “bad hair day”
• Getting up on the “wrong side of the bed”

What words do you use to describe your “bad” mental, physical, or emotional state? Whatever they are, consider them to be your cues for digging deeper. You might just find out that a non-diet approach, self-compassion and self-acceptance may be better answers to your challenging internal states. As always, get in touch if you would you like to be guided in this journey – this path does not have to feel lonely, and certainly, it does not have to feel “fat”!